Parenting: One Long Guilt Trip

After my daughter was born a good friend of mine, a mother of two said to me ‘from this day forward you will feel guilty’.  Boy! Was she right!

I feel guilty if:

  • I skip a bath
  • We keep her out a wee bit past her bedtime
  • I don’t brush her teeth or for that matter her Medusa like hair
  • I spend too much time on the computer
  • She watches too much TV
  • She gets ill because I didn’t breast feed
  • She has beans on toast for dinner
  • We skip a dance class
  • I have a glass of wine before she goes to bed
  • I give her a sneaky Happy Meal
  • I don’t play with her enough
  • I lose my patience
  • I send her to the childminders when she isn’t 100%
  • She wears the same trousers two days in a row

This list could go on and on.  But, I’ve come to the conclusion that I’m far from a perfect parent, hence the name Mediocre Mum, but as long as I’m trying my best then this will have to do.  I can hear my own mother saying these exact words to me as a kid.  Hopefully, this is something that I can instil in my own daughter.

I came across this stanza from a Poem called ‘Memo from Your Child’ and I thought it was fitting.

Child to the parent:

‘Don’t ever suggest that you are perfect or infallible. It gives me to great a shock when I discover that you are neither.’

Thank Goodness!

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19 Responses

  1. Your so right. Being a parent is one long guilt trip. You feel guilty if you go out to work, guilty if u stay home, guilty if you use disposable nappies, guilty if we didn’t puree our own baby food… The list is endless!

  2. I’m so with you on that, I feel guilty everyday for something I’ve done or not done!

  3. Yep. Do all of the above and more. And yes, the guilt is there!

  4. I guess the guilt feeling just shows how much we all care though 🙂

  5. I couldn’t agree with you more on that! guilt all the way, for everything! am i not playing with them enough, am i playing with them too much? and on and on. Sometimes i drive myself daft with it.

  6. I feel guilty all the time, currently it is about me not playing enough (usually because when I am not working, I am doing the washing, tidying up and I’m too knackered). Totally get it. UGH! I also think we partially feel like this because the media has this image of perfect Mummy’s and none of us are going to live up to that. But Mummy Zen is right, mostly it’s because we love the strange short people who live with us. XXX

  7. We do our best for our littlies and we should not feel guilty for that. 🙂

  8. Yep, I am always feeling guilty, even feel guilty about being more strict with my eldest even though there is a 5 year age gap so its quite justified! And it doesn’t help when the demon ex tries to make me feel guilty with his crappy comments lol!!

  9. We have enough to worry about without other people making us feel guilty as well!

  10. Tis true. My wife used to feel guilty when she wanted to go out as her: not as mum or as a wife. But as parents we need time to be ‘us’ so that we can be better parents. We want the best for our kids so sometimes we need to spend time for us not for them.

  11. Tell me about it… I really thought I was going to be perfect mum… now I compromise left, right and centre and feel guilty about it… and I have done all of the things on your list and more. I now accept that I am no-where-near-perfect-mum but I do my best and my kids seem happy and I love them. So let’s hope that’ll do – cheers – here’s to a crafty glass of vino – because we’re worth it!

  12. Cheers!

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